South William St VVIP Awards

 

Ok, so we’ve been a little bit shite at posting recently, but we’ve had some GIANT SoundChecks including the epicness that was Paddy Monster.

But that was the past, my friends, now to the future. The inaugural South William St VVIP Awards are taking place at SoundCheck this Thursday. In order to clear up confusion, interest, and strange sexy messages we’ve been getting about this event, here are some SWSVVIPs FAQs.

Is this a joke?
While we’re well aware that this Thursday is April Fool’s Day, soz babes, the VVIPs are for real. This is a real ceremony with real people, real booze, real awards, and real, you know, realness. Reality, basically.

Will there be midgets?
Ask Brian Spollen.

Should I be offended if I’ve been nominated?
Not if you have any grasp of irony.

Should I be offended if I haven’t been nominated?
Yes

What can I expect on the night?
A good laugh and hopefully some naked mud/jelly wrestling. Also, many surprises, some possibly unpleasant.

OMG I’m in, what’s the damage?
It’s free, dumbass.

If I like it, should I put a ring on it?
Uh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh.

Most importantly, what’s the dress code?
Late 80s-recession-depression era-sequins-part-Ghandi-part-Harlem Globetrotter-post-McQueen-militant vegan-Gucci power lesbian-informally formal-animal costumed-post-tuxedo-frustrated banking executive-circus ringmaster-relevent irelevent post-ironic-hot farmer-cracker knacker-1940s Disney-astronaut.

The South William St VVIPs, Thursday, April 1st, SPY, 7pm, please arrive early for maximum awesomeness.